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Arleah is available to do seminars for professionals and lay people. Some possible topics are:
- "Treating The Patient With No Hope Of Recovery"
- Patients with terminal illness often get stuck in the second stage
of the grieving process – anger. They struggle to articulate their
anger and it often comes out indirectly; as over-talking,
withdrawal, passive-aggressive behavior, or irritability with those
trying to help. It is critical to help them express their anger.
" Nothing turns to hostility quicker than suppressed grief."
- Family members struggle greatly with their own anger toward the
patient. They feel guilty, often ashamed of their anger. They often
need a private place, away from the patient, to express their
- Appreciating the difference between Acute and Chronic grief can
be helpful to everyone. Acute grief is intense, energized, and
present-based. It comes with little warning and is over quickly.
Chronic grief is less intense, controlled, and infiltrated with
unresolved loss from the past.
- Most people have spent a lifetime controlling their intense
emotions. This is particularly true for men. So its deeply
frightening for them to tap into these feelings.
- If healthcare professionals are going to be optimally helpful,
they need to have a handle on their emotional triggers, and have as
clear as possible an understanding of their own losses – grieved and
- Keep discussions of feelings simple, and give patients options to
react to. Stick to the primary feelings: Mad, Sad, Glad, Hurt, and
- The "List of Ten" can be very helpful. Grieving is draining and exhausting for everyone. The patient needs to grieve with another person; and they can often exhaust the other person. Consequently, they need a multitude of resources – thus, the "List of Ten."
For the lay public: staying Current with your process is one of the most important aspects of having a life after a death. It is often difficult to make a connection with feelings/behavior that seems totally unrelated to sadness and loss.
- "Creating A Life After A Death"
- What to look for that makes the connection.
- What to do about the disconnect
- What to expect with a resolution
- "Rituals, Grieving & Recovery"
- The added pain of your own change with mementos and rituals
- What to do with the old ways and objects
- What to replace them with
- "Understanding Loss: Shame, Guilt & Regret."
- How to quiet the unrelenting thread of guilt that nags and chafes
- What to do about all the "shoulds" and "if onlys"
- Healing the shame of not being "enough"
- "The Confusion of Loss: Separating Past and Present Grief"
- Understanding the brutality of the loss of a child and what else that dredges up.
- Learning that bereavement cuts to your core, through carefully built defenses
- Some important clues and what to do about them.
- "Half A Degree of Separation: Acute vs. Chronic Grief"
- The tension between letting go and never forgetting
- Letting others care and comfort you
- You have to do it for yourself, but you can't do it alone